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Group Discussion
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People Skills
May 2,2026
Week 4: Releasing Resentment
Jeff Griffin
Romans 12:18-21
Growing in how we relate to others is key to thriving in every area of life. And Jesus offers us plenty of relational tools to help us. Knowing what we can and can’t do when the other person won’t meet us half way can be powerful in maturing our people skills.
If you could have an unlimited supply of one thing, what would it be?
1. Read Romans 12:18-21. Do you find that first sentence (v. 18) comforting or challenging? Why? Is it possible?
2. Jeff pointed out that in forgiving we must not seek revenge. What explanation does verse 19 offer for this? If we leave room for God to act, what difference can that make for us? For the other person?
3. Paul goes on to quote Proverbs (25:21-22) as instruction for how we should behave in place of seeking revenge. Do you think the instruction was meant to be literal or figurative? Can you remember a time when you did this? What did you do? How did it make you feel? Did it change your relationship with that person?
4. Now look at Hebrews 12:14 which shares a similar sentiment. What characteristic does the writer of Hebrews tie to living in peace? Why do you think they might be related? Why does the author say this [being holy] is important?
Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. (Hebrews 12:14, NIV)
5. Jeff talked about how forgiveness should be a fundamental part of our identity as those forgiven in Christ. Take some time in silent meditation to consider what God has forgiven you for.
6. Without repentance on the part of the one who wronged us, we can’t be reconciled with them or offer them absolution, as Jeff explained. How might such circumstances grow our faith, as well as our relational skills? What can we do to live out the “as far as it depends on you” part without getting stuck?
We’re hard wired for justice which makes releasing resentment a challenge. Pray as a group for God to reveal any lingering unforgiveness.
“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” (Mark 11:25, NIV)